Local Man Referees NFL Preseason Game From Bar

BOSTON-

A local Boston man became the first to referee a professional sporting event from the confines of a bar, hundreds of miles away.  Mike Rithjin was sitting in a bar outside of Fenway park last night when the preseason game between the Baltimore Ravens and Washington Redskins came on one of the televisions.  It was at this point that Mr. Rithjin decided to make history.  He began shouting calls at the TV and at anyone brave enough to make eye contact with him.  As he became increasingly more inebriated, the bar stool official started splicing his calls with extreme political conspiracies.  A man at the bar recalled the historic event:

“Homeboy just started yelling about the football game which was weird enough because the Sox were on.  But he just got belligerent.  He was grabbing guys and yelling about the government or something, I don’t know, he was drinking cosmos or some shit.”

A recap of Rithjin’s performance shows that he called “holding” or “hulding” on every single play of the game.  Sometimes shouting it repeatedly during longer plays, calling it on 8 or 9 players at once.

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